Dropping the kids off for their first day of school wasn’t hard for me. There was the usual madness, and ours was compounded by the fact we weren’t able to go to Open House. Both children were nervous, The Older because any sort of change is cause for anxiety, and The Younger because she started kindergarten (new school, new rules, new kids, new everything). Parking was a madhouse, walking was a challenge, and getting what I had to have filled out the first day for both classrooms made me sweat and do a whole bunch of cursing (inside my head, of course).
We delivered both kids successfully, and The Daddy and I even managed to navigate our way out of the parking lot and away from the school safely. He left for work, and I made my usual shake for breakfast… and now I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes. The silence is so loud in my house that it’s almost crushing me, and I don’t know what to do with myself.
The Younger was in Pre-K last year, so it isn’t like I’m not used to a few hours on my own. I used to run errands during that time, or go to the gym, or write, or whatever. I still plan on doing that, but this is so different, because the things we used to do together after I picked her up are now the things she’ll be doing with her new teachers. All her funny, crazy statements will be heard and appreciated by other people, and her laughter will be heard by people other than me. She’ll have all these new experiences I won’t be part of, and I WASN’T DONE SHARING HER FIRSTS WITH HER YET!